Oh, shoplifters of the world — you’re not going to unite and take over with these kinds of tactics. A Kirksville, MO. man was arrested on Thursday for trying to boost a $517 Viore (yeah) LCD television by swapping the UPC tag with one from a $3.16 bottle of water. Apparently, cashiers weren’t fooled by the admittedly paper-thin maneuver, and after four swipe attempts, a replaced paper spool, and one PA announcement for a store manager to come to register 14, they had the super-genius switcher thrown in the big house. If convicted, the man faces up to seven years in prison plus a hefty fine… and the lifelong shame of having tried to pull this stunt off.

It’s taken a few years, but lightning’s struck twice for Microsoft’s Entertainment and Devices division (the portion of the company responsible for Zune, Windows Mobile, and Xbox). The operating profit of $89 million that E&D drew is just a drop in MSFT’s far, far larger fiscal bucket, but unless business turns sour, from here on out it looks like the group making all the fun stuff in Redmond is no longer in the business of losing cash hand over fist.

It’s been a hot minute since we’ve seen a flashy new pen tablet from Genius, but the outfit is getting set to unload a new duo onto the market for artists looking to get their penmanship directly onto the LCD. The G-Pen M712 and M609 both arrive with Vista / Mac-compatible software, sport 4,000 LPI resolutions and come with rolling pads at the top for scrolling, zooming and adjusting volume. As for the M609, expect a screen size of 9- x 5.5-inches (wide) / 7.25- x 5.5-inches (standard) and 26 hot keys, while the M712 offers up a bit more real estate at 12- x 7.25-inches (wide) / 9.5- x 7.25-inches (standard) and includes 34 hot keys. Look for ‘em both to land real soon for $195 and $249, respectively. Full release waiting after the jump.

Oregon Scientific managed to pique our interest with its proximity-sensing Weather In Motion clock, and it now looks like it’s got the solution for anyone that wishes they could take it with ‘em wherever they go, with the company set to release its new Meteo weather forecasting watch. While the need for a proximity sensor is obviously eliminated this time around, the watch apparently boasts the same weather information in icon-form as its desk-based companion, along with your usual time-telling, stop watch and alarm features. Look for this one to set you back £40 (or about $80) when it’s released next month.

So we’ve got it on authority that the second-gen iPhone is already well into testing, and numerous units are floating around in super secret pockets. A trusted source got a chance to check one out, here’s what we’ve heard.

• The first thing people will notice: the 2nd gen iPhone will be about the same size and shape as the first gen.
• It will, of course, have 3G. And proper GPS!
• The most noticeable physical difference is back of the phone is no longer metal — the whole thing is glossy black, from top to bottom. The volume buttons are now chrome.
• Because it’s got a little less metal to deal with, it doesn’t have quite as many angular edges. The battery is (still) not removable.
• The phone itself will be slightly thicker than the first gen device.
• The headphone jack will no longer be recessed, and will finally be flush with the body.
• The device itself uses roughly the same size and resolution screen as the first generation product.
• No solid word on battery life or storage capacity.

Just in case you need 500 pixels or more to really determine whether something is sexy or not, MSI has finally put together a sweet pack of press shots that really do the Wind justice. Needless to say, we’d be mighty hesitant to start bangin’ out the 42nd page of our dissertation with grease-covered digits on this beauty. Did someone say high maintenance? Hit the read link for lots more looks.

Got yourself an Archos TV+? How’s about a WiFi-enabled 605 / 705 PMP? Even if you’re sadly answering “no” to the latter question, folks with a Windows or Windows Mobile-based machine can still get in on the placeshifting action, as Archos has just announced a swank new TV+ plug-in that brings Slingbox capabilities to those devices. The May-bound TVportation application, which will be available gratis for those who register their Archos TV+ on the firm’s website (it’s $49.99 otherwise), simply enables users to control their set-top-box from anywhere where WiFi is accessible, giving users the ability to watch live TV on their handheld. Sure, it’s more of the same, but for the Archos faithful who refuse to trade in their 605 / 705, it’s a dream come true. Check out a lengthy demonstration vid after the break. [Warning: PDF read link]

Let’s preface this by saying that we honestly have no idea what’s going on with the hot BlackBerry 9000, but Fortune is reporting that it’s delayed due to either a) AT&T concerns over call quality; b) AT&T concerns over launching a 3G Blackberry and the 3G iPhone at the same time or; c) or something else entirely. That’s news to our homeboy Boy Genius, who thinks Fortune needs to start double-checking its model numbers and code names before it starts rumor-mongering, and points out that he’s been on top of power-management-related 9000 delays for a while now. Testy! We’re a little more inclined to trust BGR on this stuff — the man’s got a point when he says he’s gotten pre-release versions of every RIM device since the Pearl 8100, and if the 9000’s faster processor and 3G are indeed causing power problems, he’s likely to notice. Let’s just hope this all gets sorted soon — we’re ready to move on up.

Considering that Samsung’s YP-P2 just might be the most updated PMP of all time, we’re guessing that a lot of things that users would have changed just months ago have already been done by the powers that be. That being said, we critical gadget owners are never truly satisfied at heart, so we’re curious to know how you’d spin the forthcoming firmware update(s). Or would you focus your attention on external matters, instead? We know you’ve had ample time to fool around with one of Sammy’s most prized media players ever, so don’t be shy down there in comments, alright? Who knows — your recommendations could be front and center in the next Blue Wave.